Apparently I’ve had teeth since I was in the womb. It all happened around six weeks after conception. I guess you could say that’s when everything started going wrong. Teeth are a little bit like fingerprints in that no two sets are the same. Which means I can assure you that mine are different – and much worst – than yours. The cost of sedation dentistry is certainly something I looked into, but never something I could afford. My dentals plans have always been don’t die, don’t look too upset in front of the dentist when you see them and try to avoid ever going back.
According to the American Academy of Cosmetic Dentistry, as well as my first boss out of college, everyone things a beautiful smile is a super important asset. Unfortunately for me, cosmetic teeth surgery and the cost of laser teeth whitening were never in the budget. I sought a cheap dentist with relatively good dental reviews to execute my dentals plans.
When I finally found the right guy, he was kind of enough to tell me I was in the “persistent halitosis” club – meaning I was among the 85% of the population with a dental condition causing bad breath. He made some passing remark about how he was “so glad I was there” and that I was “in good company because after all, 66% of people who get cosmetic dentistry are female.” “Fabulous,” I thought, “Us gals are making 82 cents on the dollar and spending like 15 of those cents on needless cosmetic dentristy. Love to be in the club!”
The first thing he suggested was breaking my jaw bone to insert an implant that would heal within 12 weeks. No wonder I walked away from the situation with Odontophobia, or a huge freaking fear of dentists. In the end, I told him nothing structural! I will get cavities filled and we can even do a little teeth whitening, but I need my flawed teeth to stay right where they are at. He told me I might want to look into dentists that match my plans, because he is into the big construction. I haven’t been back to the dentist since, and I don’t intend to!
